If I Could Turn Back Time…I’d Buy You A New Helmet


cher.jpg This is the kind of news story that drives me completely insane.

Today from CNN…CNN, people! Cher supports better helmets for our troops! GASP! How could she?!

NEW YORK (AP) — Cher, who opposes the war in Iraq but supports the troops, says using her celebrity to promote effective helmets for U.S. soldiers is rewarding — and “the right thing to do.”

Apparently, last week, Ms. Cher went to Washington. There she attended a hearing on whether to modify helmets for soldiers in Iraq. She has donated more than $130,000 to the group Operation Helmet, which pays about $100 to modify the inside of soldiers’ helmets to make them better able to absorb shock from a bomb blast.

This was very nice of Cher…pats Cher on the head. But let me ask a question…whether for or against the war…why wouldn’t someone support this kind of thing? Geesh. It doesn’t make Cher some great philanthropist or patriot…it makes her someone with deep pockets who does something respectable with the money…for that I applaud her.

But why, for the love of all that is Cher, would CNN report this? Why make it about Cher and about Cher’s stance on the war?

WHY!? Gah…this pisses me off.

I went to see Cher on her farewell tour about four years ago with my friends Jon and Mary. Great show. About a gazillion costume changes. Campiness extraodinaire. And the transvestite sitting in the seat next to me was convinced that the eerily robotic elephant Cher rode onto the stage in the second act was real. I just smiled and patted his little gloved hand, “Whatever you say, sweetie…let’s just enjoy the show, okay?”

Listen, Cher gives a great concert…a fantastic concert…but, let’s face it…most of us have seen her ass…can list her tattoos…can name her no. 1 hits on one hand (maybe two)…and are still reeling with dizziness at her Bob Mackie Oscar “gowns.” So, excuse me if I don’t see Cher as the source I turn to for helping me to formulate my thoughts on foreign policy.

Just like I don’t need my bank teller to tell me what she thinks about Bush’s stance on abortion before she cashes my check. And just like I don’t need my hair dresser to state what he thinks on welfare reform before my wash, cut, and blow dry. And just like I don’t need my grocery store clerk to elaborate on the benefits of torte reform before ringing up my box of Ho Hos…I don’t need Cher, Bono, Susan Sarandon, or any other entertainer to tell me war is bad.

I can figure it out myself.

Stick to singing and acting, toots (use those avenues…not the national media…for social commentary). Give your money to good causes…but keep your cause good by keeping your trap shut.



6 Responses to “If I Could Turn Back Time…I’d Buy You A New Helmet”

  1. suzi-q Says:

    Shell, you are so correct. I agree with you whole-heartedly. Enjoyed reading the article.

  2. bamaborntxbred Says:

    One of my favorite television moments of 2005: The Katrina Fundraiser with Kanye West and Mike Meyers. Kanye in all his rage starts going off on G.W. while Mike stands there with this “Oh shit” look on his face. Quote of the year: “George Bush does not like black people!”. I was dying all over the place. I mean, I really felt for him b/c of his anger and frustration, I could understand that, but come on. His claim to fame is a song called “Gold-digger” and he’s on national t.v. preaching to us. Gimme a break.

  3. Shelleyhttp://talkweblog.blogspot.com Says:

    I feel ya, bamaborntxbred. Everyone has a right to their opinion and beliefs and all of that…but to take advantage of folks who view events like that fundraiser or awards shows or whatever really irritates me.

    Not everyone is blessed to have such a grandstand from which to belt…I mean, other than a blog ;)…what venue is available for Joe Schmoe down the street to voice to millions of people for free and under the guise of entertainment?

  4. gramps Says:

    Cher might be coming across as sanctimonious and preachy to some, but it’s her right to do it. I’m bombarded with opinions of others all the time that I don’t agree with, from a relative who finds faults with my religion to my barber who wants to nuke China.

    You can disagree with Cher and even belittle her opinions based on her lack of chart hits over the last 30 years, but her fame does not disallow her right to have a public opinion.

  5. Quossum Says:

    WHAT? You mean singers and entertainers DON’T hold some sort of special powers of discernment which make their views on “issues” more valid than ours?

    Almost as annoying is when people say they like entertainer so-and-so better now because so-and-so came out with a political view that matched theirs. Please.


  6. suzi-q Says:

    quossum, kind of scary isn’t it that folks are compelled to align themselves with entertainers with some popularity,I “pity the fool” that places value in the public face of any entertainer. As my hubby says “they put their pants on one leg at a time just like the rest of us”. If we could keep that view in our minds perhaps the glitter (or lack of in some costumes of Cher’s) would allow us to see someone for who they are a singer with a public forum:)”That’s it and that’s all”

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